The first step in becoming a hot shot fighter pilot is learning the lingo. You won’t even get past round one without an arsenal of one liners. Read and learn, tough guy.
[first lines]
Strike: Ghost Rider, this is Strike. We have unknown aircraft inbound Mustang. Your vector zero-nine-zero for bogey.
Maverick: Tower, this is Ghost rider requesting a flyby.
Air Boss Johnson: That’s a negative Ghost rider, the pattern is full.
Goose: Great balls of fire!
Maverick: Standby, Viper’s coming down.
Maverick: Jesus, this guy’s good!
Viper: Damn, this kid is good!
Jester: That was some of the best flying I’ve seen to date – right up to the part where you got killed.
Hollywood: Gutsiest move I ever saw, Mav.
Viper: In case some of you are wondering who the best is they are up here on this plaque.
[turns to Maverick]
Viper: Do you think your name will be on that plaque?
Maverick: Yes sir.
Viper: That’s pretty arrogant, considering the company you’re in.
Maverick: Yes sir.
Viper: I like that in a pilot.
Viper: Good morning, gentlemen, the temperature is 110 degrees.
Wolfman: Holy shit, it’s Viper!
Goose: Viper’s up here, great… oh shit…
Maverick: Great, he’s probably saying, “Holy shit, it’s Maverick and Goose.”
Goose: Yeah, I’m sure he’s saying that.
Maverick: That son of a bitch cut me off!
Iceman: You two really are cowboys.
Maverick: What’s your problem, Kazanski?
Iceman: You’re everyone’s problem. That’s because every time you go up in the air, you’re unsafe. I don’t like you because you’re dangerous.
Maverick: That’s right! Ice… man. I am dangerous.
Charlie: Excuse me, Lieutenant. Is there something wrong?
Maverick: Yes ma’am, the data on the MiG is inaccurate.
Charlie: How’s that, Lieutenant?
Maverick: Well, I just happened to see a MiG 28 do a…
Goose: We!
Maverick: Uh, sorry Goose. WE happened to see a MiG 28 do a 4g negative dive.
Charlie: Where did you see this?
Maverick: Uh, that’s classified.
Charlie: It’s what?
Maverick: It’s classified. I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.
Viper: I flew with your old man. VF-51, the Oriskany. You’re a lot like he was. Only better… and worse. He was a natural heroic son of a bitch that one.
Maverick: So he DID do it right.
Viper: Yeah, he did it right… Is that why you fly the way you do? Trying to prove something? Yeah your old man did it right. What I’m about to tell you is classified. It could end my career. We were in the worst dogfight I ever dreamed of. There were bogeys like fireflies all over the sky. His F-4 was hit, and he was wounded, but he could’ve made it back. He stayed in it, saved three planes before he bought it.
Maverick: How come I never heard that before?
Viper: Well that’s not something the State Department tells dependents when the battle occurred over the wrong line on some map.
Maverick: So you were there?
Viper: I was there. What’s on your mind?
Maverick: My options, Sir.
Viper: Simple. First you’ve acquired enough points to show up tomorrow and graduate with your Top Gun class, or you can quit. There’d be no disgrace. That spin was hell, it would’ve shook me up.
Maverick: So you think I should quit?
Viper: I didn’t say that. The simple fact is you feel responsible for Goose and you have a confidence problem. Now I’m not gonna sit here and blow sunshine up your ass, Lieutenant. A good pilot is compelled to evaluate what’s happened, so he can apply what he’s learned. Up there, we gotta push it. That’s our job. It’s your option Lieutenant. All yours.
Maverick: Sorry to bother you on a Sunday, Sir, but thank you very much for your time.
Viper: No Problem. Good luck.
[watching a video of planes being shot down]
Wolfman: This gives me a hard on.
Hollywood: Don’t tease me.
Carole: Hey Goose you big stud!
Goose: That’s me, honey.
Carole: Take me to bed or lose me forever.
Goose: Show me the way home, honey.
Slider: Goose who’s butt did you kiss to get in here anyway?
Goose: The list is long, but distinguished.
Slider: Yeah, well so is my Johnson.
Goose: The defense department regrets to inform you that your sons are dead because they were stupid.
Iceman: The plaque for the alternates is down in the ladies room.
Maverick: I think I’ll go embarrass myself with Goose
Maverick: This is what I call a target rich environment.
Goose: You live your life between your legs Mav.
Maverick: Goose, even you could get laid in a place like this.
Goose: Hell, I’d be happy to just find a girl that would talk dirty to me.
Maverick: I feel the need…
Maverick, Goose: …the need for speed!
Maverick: You don’t have time to think up there. If you think, you’re dead.
Stinger: And if you screw up just this much, you’ll be flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong!
Maverick: Yes sir!
Iceman: You can be my wingman any time.
Maverick: Bullshit! You can be mine.
Stinger: They gave you your choice of duty son, anything, anywhere. Do you believe that shit? Where do you think you wanna go?
Maverick: I thought of being an instructor, sir.
Stinger: Top Gun?
Maverick: Yes, sir.
Stinger: God help us.
Charlie: What do you wanna do? Just drop down on the tile and go for it?
Maverick: No, actually I had this counter in mind.
Charlie: Great, that would be very, very comfortable, yeah.
Maverick: It could be.
Goose: No. No, Mav, this is not a good idea.
Maverick: Sorry Goose, but it’s time to buzz a tower.
Viper: Top Gun rules of engagement are written for your safety and for that of your team. They are not flexible, nor am I. Either obey them or you are history. Is that clear?
Goose: Come on, Mav, do some of that pilot shit!
[Flying above MiG upside down]
Goose: Is this your idea of fun, Mav?
Charlie: I’ll have what he’s having. Hemlock is it?
Maverick: Ice water.
[to Cougar and Merlin while up in the air]
Maverick: Any of you boys seen an aircraft-carrier around here?
[Charlie has just given Maverick her address while pretending to turn down his date offer]
Slider: Crashed and burned! Huh, Mav?
Maverick: Hey, Slider.
[sniffs]
Maverick: You stink!
Charlie: Listen, can I ask you a personal question?
Maverick: That depends.
Charlie: Are you a good pilot?
Maverick: I can hold my own.
Charlie: Great, then I won’t have to worry about you making your living as a singer.
Maverick: I’m going to need a beer to put these flames out. Yo! Great Mav, real slick.
Cougar: Got dammit mustang! This is Ghost Rider 117, this bogey is all over me. He’s got missile lock on me. Do I have permission to fire?
Stinger: Do not fire until fired upon…
Goose: Yeeha, Jester’s dead!
Wolfman: Won this bullshit?
Goose: Didn’t everybody?
Hollywood: Hell no, man. We got our butts kicked.
Wolfman: Thirty seconds. We went like this, he went like that. I said to Hollywood, “Where’d he go?” Hollywood says, “Where’d who go?”
Hollywood: Yeah, and he’s laughing at us, right on the radio, he’s laughing at us.
Slider: That was me laughing, dickhead.
[Merlin sees the last two MiGs flying away at the end of the dogfight]
Merlin: Mustang, this is Voodoo 3. Remaining MiGs are bugging out.
[to Maverick after the last dogfight]
Stinger: How’s it feel to be on the front page of every newspaper in the english-speaking world, even though the other side denies the incident? Congratulations.
[Iceman shoots down a MiG]
Slider: Splash that sucker, yeah!
Officer: [In the midst of the MIG battle] Both Catapults are broken Sir.
Stinger: How long will it take?
Officer: It’ll take ten minutes.
Stinger: Bull shit ten minutes! This thing will be over in two minutes! Get on it!
[last lines]
Charlie: Hello, Pete Mitchell. I heard the best of the best were going to be back here, so uh…
Maverick: This could be complicated. You know on the first one I crashed and burned.
Charlie: And the second?
Maverick: I don’t know, but uh, it’s looking good so far.
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